online gambling prostitutes
$3,500? I fold!!

The 2011 WSOP brought out the best of online casino gamblers to Las Vegas where $10,000 per night prostitutes taught them some moves.

The WSOP main event always brought out the usual suspects – the world’s top escorts, best courtesans, and most expensive girlfriends that money can buy by the hour – and this year was no exception.

The best of the best of dedicated practitioners of this slowly disappearing art of ‘pleasing men’ were charging $3500 for an hour long relaxation session guaranteed to reinvigorate even the most beached of online whales.

According to casino gambling news, the $10,000 full night service promises to even surprise the expectation of connoisseurs of professional stress relievers such as the likes of Charlie Sheen.

Dedicated Online Gambler: Sun is Seen for First Time in Years

This year’s crop of potential champions was a decent stock with only a small number of truly ‘dedicated’ online gamblers present – those who lost all desire to live in the physical world.

A few of the recent winners from the fast paced world of online casino blackjack and poker rooms, where tens of thousands of dollars are bet on every digital hand, have little experience with ‘real life’ social interaction.

One young internet poker and online blackjack strategy master even loudly said ‘LOL’ instead of laughing at a funny joke. His milky white, almost translucent newt-like skin was untouched by sunlight.

A strong casino light almost shined through him to momentarily create an x-ray image exposing the physique of a newly liberated concentration camp victim.

This wizard of no limit poker, online blackjack and Android casinos, gawked at images of past WSOP Main Event winners making even the great Stuey Ungar somehow looked healthier after a month long crack binge.

Despite being in his early 20s, he still looked no older than 14, with stunted growth, sunken eyes and interesting twitches. This is where ‘professional help’ was needed, most old timers grumbled, and for at least this first time Vegas gambler, the perfect helper arrived.

From what I could overhear, the ‘see through kid’ was badly in need of calcium supplements, had built up his bankroll to over a million, yet has never experienced the company of a woman outside of adult video chat lines.

Egged on by friends, while fired up on liquid courage (O’Doul’s beer) during one of the breaks, he arranged for an all-night ‘date’ with a $10,000 escort. His companion turned out to be a Brazilian lady composed of interlaced curves, a lovely smile, sparkling eyes and a physique of Jennifer Lopes in her prime.

Towards late afternoon of the next day the ‘invisible boy’ shows up, and as the song goes “what a difference a day makes.” A completely transformed person was there with an ear to ear grin and possibly even a few pounds heavier.

I’ve never seen a pregnant woman ‘glowing’ (as the expression goes), but this kid sure was glowing. Maybe it was one of those lady-boys, I thought, and the kid got knocked up after mutating from 8 years of online gambling in his mom’s basement, a lack of sunlight and no vitamins.

But no, his friends moved him away from the projection light, and dragged him back within the bosom of this miracle making Las Vegas casino.